How to Stop Unwanted Thoughts

“Our life is what our thoughts make it", said the Roman emperor and philosopher Marcus Aurelius. So, our life is a product of what we think. How then to stop the thoughts that we don’t want to think?

The technique of thought-stopping – We are all familiar with that feeling when we don’t want to think about something, but we still do and torment ourselves with our own thoughts. The worrying thoughts, unwelcome speculations, negative predictions may be circulating rapidly in our minds, and we may see no rescue from them. In this case there is a very simple and effective method in psychology called thought-stopping. This technique helps us not to feel depressed and afraid, but to look for a solution. We recognize the success of the method in the moment when we "wake up" and stop the negative thoughts that are circling in our minds.

First step: say "stop" loudly - Sit upright in a quiet place (head up) and think about what's bothering you. Then take an object (a hammer or the like), it can be fist as well, and hit hard on the table (the harder the better) and tell yourself out loud "stop". You will be surprised how soon you will be “awakened” and thoughts that worry you will just disappear.

Step two: give yourself instructions - Give yourself the instructions you need follow to fix the problem – things that bother you. For example, tomorrow I’m going to go to my friend’s, what do I need to bring, or tomorrow I need to call my boss, what facts should I mention in order for her/him to understand me. With these thoughts you replace those that bother you.

Step three: the power of persuasion - Start thinking differently. Find a song you particularly like and invent new, positive words to the same melody. Make up the persuasive text, such as "I will succeed, I am brave, I'm starting from scratch, the world belongs to me." It is very important that every time you notice tormenting thoughts coming, to stop them immediately and start singing your song out loud.

Step Four: think positive - Pay attention to your inner dialogues, and design them so that you foresee all well for yourself. Instead of telling yourself: “I won’t find parking anywhere in here," tell yourself "Somewhere here is my parking spot." Convince yourself that you have a good future - our expectations lead to our observations.

However, changing your thinking may take some time. You need to practice thought-stopping every day. After a while, you'll be able to stop unwanted thoughts right away.